


Happy Freakin' Christmas

by critterdee_67



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-27 07:12:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17157581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/critterdee_67/pseuds/critterdee_67
Summary: This takes place in Season 14, after episode 8 before episode 10.If you haven't watched Season 14 there may be spoilers.





	Happy Freakin' Christmas

 

 

The Christmas party is raging full steam ahead in the Bunker. All the folks from that other Earth are in attendance, along with a few other hunters that are still alive and well.

Sam is making toasts and serving his extra-special eggnog; it’s good to see the man laugh and enjoy himself. It’s good to see all of these people enjoy themselves for a change. The warding is strong, and Cas has made sure to beef it up due to the mega-monsters lose out there in the world now.

Even Dean is smiling and joking around with a few of the other hunters; he is still a bit standoffish toward some of the AU people. But those who know Dean, understand that it takes him a bit longer than most to develop a level of trust.

Cas wanders through the crowd and watches as everyone shares in the Christmas spirit, and _spirits_ that seem to be never-ending. He smiles and chats with others now and then, but he is unable to be absorbed in the happiness of the day. That is just not an option.

Dean has been watching Cas as Cas has been watching everyone else. He can see the way Cas’s smile is too fake, and there is no sparkle in those brilliant blue eyes. He can also tell that Cas has been avoiding him.

“Hey, Cas.”

Cas startles when Dean touches his shoulder.

“Hello, Dean. Merry Christmas.” Cas replies and moves to walk away. Dean places a hand on his bicep, and although there is no force behind the hold, Cas is unable to walk away.

Dean slides his hand across Cas’s chest and over his opposite shoulder, turning Cas towards the kitchen. “Will you please come with me? Somewhere a little quieter. So we can talk.”

Cas nods, his entire body feels like he is standing at the epicenter of an earthquake. ‘ _This is bad; this can’t happen._ ’ He thinks while his feet carry him along behind Dean, through the kitchen and down the hall to Dean’s room. ‘ _Oh, shit, no, no. Hold it together Cas._ ’

“Hey, man. You look terrified. What’s wrong?” Dean asks when Cas enters his room and stands near the door. “Make yourself at home. I just didn’t feel like sharing this out there with all those… people.” Dean tries to explain as he sits on his bed, reaching under and pulling out a small gift.

“I know this ain’t much but I know it’s one of your favorites, and one of mine too - Sam can never know!” Dean grins, holding out the package toward Cas. He motions for Cas to come closer and take the gift. “Dude, I promise not to bite.” Dean laughs.

Cas smiles a sad smile and finally takes a seat next to Dean on his bed. He examines the red paper with little snowmen and snowwomen and the too big gold bow.

“Well, you’ll never know what’s in it if you don’t rip it open.” Dean nudges his shoulder against Cas’s.

Cas grins and nods, finding the seam and carefully unwraps the package.

“The Princess Bride?” He can’t help himself, he laughs. “Oh, my word! Dean! This is actually really great. Thank you.” He smiles at Dean.

Dean wraps an arm around Cas’s shoulders and gives him a side hug. “I thought you’d like it. I won’t tell Sam, if you won’t” Dean winks at Cas.

“Our little secret.” Cas agrees.

“I’m kinda hoping it will help you out of your slump. You’ve been so sad since Jack came back. I miss that smile, buddy. There’s actually a lot of things I miss. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately and…”

Cas stands, taking a few steps away from the bed. “Dean. Please. Don’t.”

Dean stands to face Cas, but Cas holds out a hand to keep him at a distance.

“Dean, please.” Cas’s voice is as near begging as Dean has ever heard, Cas sounds so frightened and sad and… hopeless.

“Cas, what is going on? I thought… all this time, all these years… Cas I lo…”

“NO! Please!” Cas presses his hand over Dean’s mouth. “Please, Dean. Just not yet, not now.”

Dean pushes Cas off, both of them stumbling slightly with the force behind his shove. “What the hell, Cas?” Tears well up in Dean’s eyes and he blinks hard, angrily wiping his hand down his face.

“Dean,” Cas sits back down on the bed, “I have a confession, and I know you’re going to hate me. But, I deserve your hatred, I know I do. I knew it the moment… the moment I made the deal.”

“What fucking deal, Cas?” Dean yells, gripping Cas’s shirt collar in his fist, forcing the seated man to look up at him.

“The deal to get Jack back. The deal with the Empty.” Cas answers, just above a whisper.

Dean pulls Cas to his feet, wrapping his arms around him. “Oh, Cas. What have you done?”

Cas breaks down and tells Dean the truth about his deal with the Empty, his trade of his life for Jacks,  and how the moment that he allows himself to be truly happy, the Empty will take him.

Dean decides that A) This is officially the worst Christmas ever, and 2) He is going to fucking END the Empty one way or another.

**Author's Note:**

> Just a quick one-shot.  
> Hope you enjoyed.


End file.
